My Short Lived Friendship with Eugenia Cooney May 15, 2017 13:59:22 GMT -8
Post by scoups on May 15, 2017 13:59:22 GMT -8
I met Eugenia several years ago at the one and only Playlist Live: Tristate. I saw her and thought 'Oh, she's pretty. Thin too. I'm kinda jealous.' I didn't know of her internet presence whatsoever. A mutual friend introduced me to her, and she was so incredibly kind. We hung out the entirety of Playlist. I would help with her live broadcasts in the convention center, we would sit up all night in the lobby talking to other YouTubers and internet personalities. The day before the last night of Playlist, my friend and I invited her to eat with us in the hotel restaurant. She texted me and politely declined. I didn't think anything of it until my friend said "I haven't seen her eat or drink anything all week." And I realized I hadn't either. I thought maybe she was a shy eater, much like I am, and just ate in her room with her mom. After the event ended, she and I would text back and forth, I'd make phonecalls to her while she was on YouNow and help her read the comments, we would Skype and play silly quizzes and games, and we were making plans to attend her first Warped Tour together. As time passed, however, I noticed she was losing more weight, which concerned me because of how skinny she already was. One day on Skype I decided to try a little question-based getting to know you style game to try and squeeze some answers out of her as casually as I could. I asked her favorite food and she literally said "I don't have one I guess, haha." and continued to answer any sorts of questions like that vaguely. After a while, we lost touch. I still watched her videos though, considering she was still a kind person and I didn't dislike her at all. But she got thinner, and thinner, and thinner. I KNOW Eugenia. I've struggled my whole life with ED's. I used to try starving myself, and I tried bulemia. But because of those things, on top of being bullied for my weight, and seeing people like my friend Eugenia be so applauded for being so thin, I almost committed suicide. After that, I developed an obsessive eating disorder, and am now just over 300 lbs at the age of 21. It's almost as though her being so thin triggered something in my brain and broke my sense of reason. I don't know how to explain it. That's when I officially decided to cut ties. Deleted her on Skype, deleted her number, unsubscribed from her channel, and unfollowed on twitter. The most important thing I want you all to see, is that Eugenia's influence isn't JUST causing anorexia, but is also having this bizarre adverse effect on people. I was her friend, and I tried to help her, and my trying to help her ended up ruining my body. I don't necessarily blame Eugenia for my weight, not in the slightest, but there IS something to it. I'm sure it's something wrong in MY brain that caused me to drastically shoot from anorexia to binge eating, but I'd never even thought of starving myself in the first place until I met her. I'm not sure my point came across clearly whatsoever, but I'm trying. I've never talked about this before so I apologize if my points seem muddled or sloppy.