I don't really know what I am doing anymore. I just feel like nothing matters at all. Recently I just can't bring myself to do anything and I can hardly get out of bed for school. I hate school because of the people, the anxiety, the work, my teachers, the noise. The only thing that is ok is the two people I have. They are my girlfriend and my friend. I love them more than anything but everything in my life is just to much and I can't do it anymore. My girlfriend seems distant and I'm scared she is not interested anymore. I hate it at home because I am either yelled at for my grades or some other stupid shit that I guess I did wrong. And every day my brain tells me not to eat or only small things. Eating is another problem that there is that just won't get better. I am already seeing a therapist and it is not helping at all. I just wish I could get better but I'm scared I won't and I'm trying so hard but it just doesn't get better. And I know people have it worse than me. I've heard that speech plenty of times but telling me that it could be worse doesn't make a already bad situation any fucking better. And yet people still continue to say that. Oh well
Please don't do it. I have heard too many stories of people just quitting and giving up on life. My girlfriend of 5 years killed herself and our unborn child about a month ago, I have thought about ending it all everyday since then. I know it wouldn't be good because there is literally so much to live for. The people around you, the great things that are yet to come. My favourite band, who just reunited have a new album dropping in June. If you are like me and watch Onision everyday, his amazing, yet persistent content is something that keeps me going.